Pavlov trained his dogs to salivate anytime a bell rang. Â The way he did it was to ring a bell and then feed the dogs. Â Eventually, they salivated at the sound of the bell even when food was not provided. Â This is now called a Pavlovian response. A bonus piece of kibble should be provided […]
Most Recent Posts
Vintage Posts: Why Not To Date Co-Workers
This post caused me so much grief that I almost deleted it.  I have written posts attacking mega companies like Darden and Groupon with less reaction.  I have written posts going after TV stars and major TV networks with less reaction.  I have written posts calling  out my boss (at the time) with less […]
Random Thoughts From A Server 48
Allergies have become a hotter issue in restaurants than at any time I can recall. Â While I have great sympathy for those that are allergic to food items, the abuse of the word by picky eaters has made it more and more difficult for those with legitimate allergies. Â Restaurants will bend over backwards for people […]
The Best Restaurant Show You Haven’t Seen
I don’t like restaurant shows (except Bar Rescue because John Taffer is the real deal). Â I groaned through Waiting. Â I blame Gordon Ramsay for the most annoying guest traits. Â Don’t even get me started on restaurant dirtbag Willie Degel and his fake Restaurant Stakeout. Â I dread any conversation with a guest that begins with, “I […]
The Worlds Best Bartender: You Tube Video of the Day
I grew up in the 80s. This gives me two very deeply rooted thoughts about bartending. Â The first is that Sam Malone’s hair was the secret to him getting all the ladies. Â The second is that this bartender is awesome. As an adult server I am inspired to think, “That’s great, but can I get […]
Retro TV Ads: Avoid The Noid
If you are a child of the eighties, you probably found it impossible to avoid the noid. Â Some advertising characters catch on because they are cute and lovable. Â Not the noid though. Â The noid was a relatively annoying little guy with a single mission in life: to make your pizza cold. Â In order to avoid […]
Vintage Posts: The Card
Welcome to vintage posts where the motto is, “Come for the really cool bottle graphic, stay for one of the best stories from Restaurant Laughs.”  Or as all the kids say #CFTRCBG,SFOOTBSFRL  Or at least that is what the marketing department says. When I was settling into the new Hospitality Formula office (or as the Realtor […]
You Tube Video Of The Day: Yelper Hates Fro Yo.
Oh Real Actors Read Yelp. Â How do I love thee? Â Let me count the ways. Real Actors Read Yelp is like someone tapping straight into your brain and then building that magical dreamhouse that you always imagined. The actor’s ability to capture the snark and pettiness of the complaints is truly a testament to […]
Random Thoughts From A Server 47
So there is actually a funny story behind this napkin. The guest wanted a lobster tail for dinner. We offer lobster tails as an add-on, but not as a separate meal. I asked her if she would like to add the sides and salad to her meal and she approved. When she got the bill […]
If Hostesses Ruled The World
Restaurant servers are a highly diverse group of individuals. I think within this occupation you can find as much diversity of backgrounds and beliefs as any other in the world. There are very few common opinions that truly unite us all. I however feel that I have found one thought that unites us all. Nothing […]
Stuff Mixologists Say
I mean no offense, but I am not a fan of the “mixologist” craze. Â My opinion should carry limited weight since I do not drink. Â I have spent almost the entirety of my adult life working with bartenders though and feel qualified to share an opinion. There are three things that make a bartender great: […]
About The Author
David Hayden was born and raised in Kansas City, Missouri. He took his first serving job in 1996. Since that time, he has worked for over a dozen different restaurant companies. He has held both hourly and salaried positions at independent and corporate restaurants. He has waited on over 100,000 guests and trained hundreds of servers. He has been named "Best Server in Kansas City" the last three years by the local weekly paper.
