Pavlov trained his dogs to salivate anytime a bell rang. The way he did it was to ring a bell and then feed the dogs. Eventually, they salivated at the sound of the bell even when food was not provided. This is now called a Pavlovian response. A bonus piece of kibble should be provided […]
Welcome to Restaurant Laughs
Restaurant Laughs spotlights the lighter side of life in a restaurant. Written from a server’s point of view, you will find humorous insights on dealing with unreasonable guests, crazy co-workers, and even some of the strangest tales from restaurants around the country. All of this is shared with a love for the industry and a great deal of affection for all of the guests that make serving so rewarding. This site is more than a waiter rants and tirades. It is a genuine opportunity to look at ourselves and laugh at the absurdity of it all. These are the true tales of life inside a restaurant.
Restaurant Laughs is just one of a series of sites collectively known as The Hospitality Formula Network. This network is comprised of websites to help restaurant industry professionals advance in their careers and assist restaurant guests in understanding our industry. The Manager’s Office, Tips Squared, Foodie Knowledge and Restaurant Marketing Plan all provide great insights on the business side of things. This site is designed for comic relief. After working a long shift or recalling a horrible dining experience, we could all use a good laugh.
Restaurant Laughs, and the entire Hospitality Formula Network, are written by David Hayden. Mr. Hayden is a restaurant industry consultant, blogger, and server. His first book, Tips2: Tips For Improving Your Tips, was released in 2011 and provides restaurant servers with the knowledge they need to improve their incomes. With 17 years of experience in the hospitality industry, he shares his knowledge and stories with readers through his blogs and books. His hope is that they provide both servers and guests the opportunity to share a laugh and understand each other better.
Most Recent Posts

Vintage Posts: Why Not To Date Co-Workers
This post caused me so much grief that I almost deleted it. I have written posts attacking mega companies like Darden and Groupon with less reaction. I have written posts going after TV stars and major TV networks with less reaction. I have written posts calling out my boss (at the time) with less […]

Random Thoughts From A Server 48
Allergies have become a hotter issue in restaurants than at any time I can recall. While I have great sympathy for those that are allergic to food items, the abuse of the word by picky eaters has made it more and more difficult for those with legitimate allergies. Restaurants will bend over backwards for people […]

The Best Restaurant Show You Haven’t Seen
I don’t like restaurant shows (except Bar Rescue because John Taffer is the real deal). I groaned through Waiting. I blame Gordon Ramsay for the most annoying guest traits. Don’t even get me started on restaurant dirtbag Willie Degel and his fake Restaurant Stakeout. I dread any conversation with a guest that begins with, “I […]

The Worlds Best Bartender: You Tube Video of the Day
I grew up in the 80s. This gives me two very deeply rooted thoughts about bartending. The first is that Sam Malone’s hair was the secret to him getting all the ladies. The second is that this bartender is awesome. As an adult server I am inspired to think, “That’s great, but can I get […]

Retro TV Ads: Avoid The Noid
If you are a child of the eighties, you probably found it impossible to avoid the noid. Some advertising characters catch on because they are cute and lovable. Not the noid though. The noid was a relatively annoying little guy with a single mission in life: to make your pizza cold. In order to avoid […]

Vintage Posts: The Card
Welcome to vintage posts where the motto is, “Come for the really cool bottle graphic, stay for one of the best stories from Restaurant Laughs.” Or as all the kids say #CFTRCBG,SFOOTBSFRL Or at least that is what the marketing department says. When I was settling into the new Hospitality Formula office (or as the Realtor […]

You Tube Video Of The Day: Yelper Hates Fro Yo.
Oh Real Actors Read Yelp. How do I love thee? Let me count the ways. Real Actors Read Yelp is like someone tapping straight into your brain and then building that magical dreamhouse that you always imagined. The actor’s ability to capture the snark and pettiness of the complaints is truly a testament to […]

Random Thoughts From A Server 47
So there is actually a funny story behind this napkin. The guest wanted a lobster tail for dinner. We offer lobster tails as an add-on, but not as a separate meal. I asked her if she would like to add the sides and salad to her meal and she approved. When she got the bill […]

If Hostesses Ruled The World
Restaurant servers are a highly diverse group of individuals. I think within this occupation you can find as much diversity of backgrounds and beliefs as any other in the world. There are very few common opinions that truly unite us all. I however feel that I have found one thought that unites us all. Nothing […]

Stuff Mixologists Say
I mean no offense, but I am not a fan of the “mixologist” craze. My opinion should carry limited weight since I do not drink. I have spent almost the entirety of my adult life working with bartenders though and feel qualified to share an opinion. There are three things that make a bartender great: […]
- The Greatest Customer Complaint Response Ever September 23, 2010
- Why Not To Date Co-Workers August 14, 2010
- My Response: 25 Things Chefs Never Tell You September 16, 2010
- A Food Critic Intervention August 31, 2010
- The Card August 10, 2010
- Random Thoughts from a Server 65: Beer Glasses July 20, 2013
- T-Shirts for Servers 5 July 19, 2013
- Random Thoughts from a Server 64: Chef Gordon Ramsey July 17, 2013
- Random Thoughts from a Server 63: Jealous Boyfriends July 16, 2013
- Random Thoughts from a Server 62: Wine Keys July 15, 2013
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About The Author
David Hayden was born and raised in Kansas City, Missouri. He took his first serving job in 1996. Since that time, he has worked for over a dozen different restaurant companies. He has held both hourly and salaried positions at independent and corporate restaurants. He has waited on over 100,000 guests and trained hundreds of servers. He has been named "Best Server in Kansas City" the last three years by the local weekly paper.